Duke of Hastings: “Why is he not saying anything? He is four years old. He should be able to speak.”
Tutor: “He is quite advanced in his letters, more so than any child I have taught.”
Duke of Hastings: “He would have to be bloody Shakespeare with his letters if he cannot speak…. Let us hear it boy. Give me a word, a grunt. Talk to me, damn you!”
Tutor: “You are scaring him.”
Duke of Hastings: “And if that is what it should take, I shall get a sound from him still.” Raises a hairbrush to beat Master Simon
Master Simon: “No!”
Duke of Hastings: “What did you say?” (lowers the hairbrush)
Master Simon: “D… D… D… D… Do… n… n… n… not…”
Duke of Hastings: “What is he doing?… He’s an imbecile. He is an idiot! My God” (looks angrily at Master Simon) “Do you know how precarious of a situation we are in, boy? We have been granted this line. The monarchy itself has declared it. But it will only remain ours so long as we remain extraordinary. The Hastings name cannot land in the quivering hands of a half-wit!”
The Duke of Hastings walks toward the tutor with disgust while Master Simon starts to cry.: “Get him out of my sight. This boy is dead to me.
In the popular series called Bridgerton, The Duke of Hastings was a rather mean and rigid father. Burdened by the expectations of society, he pressured his son into becoming the perfect heir to a perfect lineage. In the process, he was rude, dismissive, and cold to Master Simon.
As a result, one may either fight back or succumb to the rudeness of another person. Be it a family member, a friend, a stranger, or even a manager at the workplace. But today, I am here to talk about the cruelty we show to ourselves each day.
If we’ve had the worst day, we dwell on everything that went wrong. We seldom congratulate ourselves for getting through it. We rarely ever thank ourselves for not leaving our side during difficult times when we had the option of giving up. Instead, we transform ourselves into the character of the Duke of Hastings. We are rude to ourselves based on any outcome that we believe us to be imbeciles or idiots and rarely want to even see ourselves in the mirror. Get out of my sight says the mind to oneself.
Lady Danbury: “Have you learned to read, to write, to ride a horse, to fence? Well then, why ever are you not in school?”
Master Simon: “I c… c… can n… n… not s… s… speak.”
Lady Danbury: “When I was a girl, some centuries ago, I was afraid even of my own reflection. I entered a room and attempted to dissolve into the shadows. But there is only so long one in a position such as ours can hide. I knew I would have to step into the light someday, and I could not very well be frightened. So, instead, I made myself frightening. I sharpened my wit, my wardrobe, and my eye, and I made myself the most terrifying creature in any room I entered.” Gentle holding Master Simon’s hand, “You can speak. I understood you well enough. And I will help you to overcome this stammer of yours. But in exchange, you must promise me that when you step into the light… you will be worthy of the attention you command.”
While every individual over the years has identified a way of appreciating themselves and commanding the same from others, don’t we owe it to ourselves to be self-appreciative, applauding, and acknowledging?
“When you are able to applaud yourself, it is much easier to applaud others.”
~Dennis Waitley
Therefore, I hand over to you a significant key to unlock and enhance your Spiritual Quotient (SiQ). The 3-A Formula to congratulate yourself on the achievements you make.
1. Acknowledge (mental action)
2. Appreciate (vocal action)
3. Applaud (physical action – body movement)
The above are three actions in which way we can be more thankful to ourselves. These actions are undertaken mentally, vocally, and physically.
When you achieve something, what do you do? Do you dance or clap for yourself? Are you genuinely and physically happy about your success, no matter how small or big? You owe it to yourself!
Look into the mirror, look at yourself, and say, “Thank you for never letting go, for never abandoning me in moments when I felt all alone in the battles of my life. Today, I am still here standing, because of you.” This can be a vocal approach to appreciating yourself.
Acknowledge yourself mentally as well. This is a very important step because when we thank ourselves mentally, we are channeling positivity toward ourselves. Your thoughts are the power behind your actions.
Doing this every day without fail can change your entire approach to life and yourself. And after some time, you will see a difference in the way you think, feel, and do things. No longer will someone else’s words bring you down will have any effect.
In the poetic words of Becca Lee, may we all believe that our journey of self-worth will be deserving of the steps we take.
And some days I forget
What it is to be gentle with myself –
How to look at myself with kind eyes
And speak of myself with soft words.
Forget that I am my home
And a temple worthy of worship.