I remember reading a short cartoon joke in a newspaper. It depicted a lady at the bag check area in the airport doing something on her laptop while the security officers breathed down her neck until she did what they instructed her to do. The cartoon strip had just one line that said it all, “They won’t let me through security until I remove the bullets from my Word document.”

What’s the level of security check like at airports around the world? Doesn’t it sometimes make you feel like you are under a great level of scrutiny? Even though it’s understandable that the security measures are based on a nation’s perceived risk of terrorism, the reality is that everyone is under suspicion.

The irony is that EVERYONE is perceived as a possible threat, intentionally or unintentionally, to ensure EVERYONE’s safety.

From scanners to bag checks, identity checks, and so on, these measures are taken because of the various unpleasant experiences of terrorism in public spaces.

Similarly, people who are cheated in their personal lives don’t want to encounter the experience again. They become extremely self-critical, beating themselves up for not being smart enough to recognize the lying and manipulations. So, in the chaos of self-judgment, we arrive at the point of suspecting everyone just to make sure we are not cheated again.

Perceiving the world from the point of Suspicion

Grandmother: at the dinner table “So how’d it go in Dallas today?”

Son-in-law, George: “Went fine. Nice people. Sheldon seemed very comfortable with the whole thing.”

A playback scene is shown where young Sheldon is welcomed to a new home in Dallas to live with a school’s faculty member, Dr Flora Douglas.

Dr Flora: “Welcome! How was the drive?”

George: entering Dr Flora’s home with his wife Mary, and son, young Sheldon, “Eh, a little traffic coming into the city but otherwise okay.”

Dr Flora: looking at young Sheldon, “Sheldon, I want you to meet my husband, Elliot.”

Husband, Elliot: looks at young Sheldon: “Well, it’s nice to meet you, young man. I’ve heard a lot about you.”

Coming back to the present ‘dinner table’ scene, young Sheldon’s mother, Mary, disagrees with George.

Mary: “George, that’s not at all how they were.”

George: “What are you talking about?”

Mary: “There was definitely something off about those people.”

George: “Really? What’d I miss?”

This time, Mary re-narrates her visit with George and young Sheldon at Dr Flora’s house in Dallas. The same playback scene but from Mary’s perspective:

A darker tone and color are set in the background of the scene:

Dr Flora: with ruffled hair resembling insanity, shouts in a loud creepy voice at the door, “Welcome….!!!! How was the drive?”

George: “Eh, a little traffic coming into the city but otherwise okay.”

Dr Flora: looking at young Sheldon, shouts again in a creepy voice “Sheldon………… I want you to meet my husband……. Elliot.”

Husband, Elliot: walks out of a strange smoke-filled room, with hair uncombed, and looks at young Sheldon: “Well, it’s nice to meet you….. young man….. I’ve heard a lot… about you.” (ominous laughter from both Elliot and Dr Flora)

George: “Oh, come on, you’re making it out like they were some kind of monsters. Sheldon has his own room. There’s books everywhere. Even has a big old backyard he won’t play in.”

Mary: “Aren’t you forgetting something?… The underground laboratory.”

George: “I think it’s called a finished basement, honey.”

Mary: “I know what I saw.”

Mary is a worried mother, a character in the popular series called Young Sheldon. She was sending her 9-year-old son, Sheldon, to another city for the first time to live with complete strangers. Her fear that something untoward might happen to her son led her to view Dr Flora and her husband Elliot as a psychopathic couple. She suspected them the entire way back home only to see things differently from the way her husband, George saw them.

That’s what suspicion can do to a person…

“Doubt is good. It means you are searching for the truth.

Suspicion is sickness – it means you already made a negative conclusion.”

~Sadhguru

Leaders with a low SiQ are mostly vulnerable to the seeds of suspicion, seeing everything from the point of fear and self-judgment. They will perceive everything with more than just a pinch of salt. Their suspicions might lead them to make error-filled decisions with unreasonable justifications. This can lead to several misunderstandings, weakened bonds personally and professionally, and the permanent build-up of confirmation bias.

Therefore, one must move from the seeds of suspicion to the deeds of transition. This is where one builds their Spiritual Quotient to transcend from the point of fear and self-judgment to the point of awareness, realization, and understanding.

The world can feel like a suspicious place and many times, our own experiences lead us down that path. However, as leaders, we have a responsibility to rise above extreme doubtfulness.

Remember that suspicion creates a one-way road to misery just as it is said in this meaningful poem:

Not Me ~by D.E. Navarro

If you find ulterior motives

in the simple deeds I do,

that’s not me, darling—

it’s you.

If you find a secret agenda

in the plans I have laid out,

it’s not mine, buddy—

it’s yours.

If you project your insecurities

held bound by your suspicions

you’ll suffer, my friend—

I won’t.

You know,

if you always think you’re being screwed

when others are just living free

you’re the one who walks in the darkness

of your self-made misery—

not me.

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